The ward

I am so excited to finally have pictures of the patients who i have come to love so much! We are not allowed to take our own pictures in the ward for the privacy of the patients. But it makes sense, if you had a huge tumor coming out of your face would you want people taking pictures of you everyday?

This is Hassan. hes 12 and hilarious. Hes been on the ship for about a month now. When he was about one and a half years old, during the civil war, rebels came into his village, stormed into his house, threatened to rape and kill his mother. I think they set their house on fire and when his mother went outside, she watch her neighbors being killed on her right, and on her left she watch her son, Hassan, be lit on fire.
I dont have a picture of his hands, but if you put your own hand into a fist, and imagine your fingers being stuck in the position, that is what Hassans hands looked it. The amazing thing is you could feel the bones of the individual fingers from the outside of his hand..if that makes sense.
We were able to take his left hand and make fingers again using skin grafts so that he will have a usable hand. I had him as a patient right after his surgery. For days he curled up in bed, never saying a word, or screaming but when i looked closely, i would see tears running down his face. "oh Hassan" i would say "if you're in pain you must tell me so i can help you!" i would kick myself for not noticing sooner. The devotion of his father brings me to tears. He feeds him, gives him water, does everything for him and has his whole life because his son has had no hands. Hes never shown to be bitter or impatient. I also watched him help other patients with getting water and such!
Now, weeks after his surgery he is one of the most outgoing boys ive met here! He flirts with all the nurses, knows all our names! Hes a completely different person. Even during his physical therapy treatments, he grimaces and bears the pain while the therapist move his fingers. Ive never heard him scream, he is such a strong boy.

Foday.
My first ever row of night shifts this kid cried ALL NIGHT FOR FOUR NIGHTS. I even gave him morphine to shut him up and it didnt work. I really hated him. On the forth night the other nurse i was working with had an idea of carrying him around with us and this actually shut him up. we gave him things to play with. and he was quite from 1am-5am. Then when we had to get work done we gave him back to his mother and his bed and he started screaming again waking everyone up.
The open ward system is kinda fun. All of the older men were complaining about this kid at 5am because no one else could sleep. that would NEVER go down in the US.

Foday had plastic surgery on his toes. I believe he was born with all of his toes curled down, which made it hard for him to walk.

Me, Hassan and Sidie.
Sidie had surgery on his left hand. Kind of like Hassan he had a burn wound that took his pinkie and ring finger and his first and middle fingers were stuck to his palm. His burn i believe was an accident with a fire at home. He thinks he a tough boy. I would say Hi Sidie! when i came into work and he would look at me and then walk away. But a few hours later when would be charting at a desk, he would come stand next to me and i would ask if he wanted to sit in my lap. He would jump up, put his head on my breast and curl up on my lap and sometimes fall asleep. Such a sweet heart!! He never said much but i loved him. I almost cried the day he was discharged. I was working in another ward and he came to visit me and i noticed he was wearing his street clothes and i asked if he was going home. He nodded his head with tears in his eyes and ran up and gave me a big hug! he was so excited to go home though and i am so happy his is healed but i will always miss him and our cuddle times.

This is Mohamed. Hes 18 and was born with testes and an ovary. In developed countries, that would be taken care of very shortly after birth. But Mohamed has had to deal with being an outcast his whole life. We were able to remove his ovary and do reconstructive surgery.
One thing i love about Mohamed is that he is so happy, and thankful; he loves God. Every sunday we have church service on the wards for patients who want to join and he always participates. I watched him worship God and thank Him for all that he has done. This world and this life has been completely unfair to him. And yet he is not bitter or angry. As for me, when stupid stuff happens, i always get angry at God and angry at Him. Yet i have such a wonderful life, im healthy and my body works the way its suppose to and i grew up in a country and a family that has been able to give me the medicine i need. Mohamed taught me to stop being a spoiled bitch and actually be thankful for all God has done for me.

This is Mohamed. (if you havent noticed, most people have the same names)

I dont even know where to start with him. Two days ago, i woke up grumpy (imagine that) and didnt want to go to work. This boy saw me in the hall, said "JESSIE!!" ran towards me jumped in my arms and give me a huge hug. Kids are so amazing. They love unconditionally. Whenever i have a bad day or just feel emotionally drained, i look for this boy and ask for a hug and i feel instantly better.

His left had was damaged in a fire and we did reconstructive surgery with skin grafts and now he wears that awesome brace that physically therapy made. He used to have k-wires in each finger. K wires are long metal pieces, kinda like a coat hanger, that run along a bone so that the fingers stay straight, instead of curl inward again like they used to be. One day Mohamed was playing on the floor with a toy car and went to pick it up...with his left hand..and the k-wires (that were sticking out of each finger) hit the floor. He stopped, looked at his hand and started screaming!! just starred at his hand for 20 minutes and screamed. ouch. but so funny!! "oh Mohamed, you need to be more careful yeah" and then he looked at the nurse and kept screaming.

I was thankful i was not his nurse the day they removed his k-wires. He had five, one in each finger, and we literally take a pair of pliers and yank them out. Hes only 4 and sadly he doesn't quite understand what we're doing. apparently he kept saying "why are you trying killing me?!" Sooooo sad!!!

The nice thing about children is that they have a short memory

Deck 7

Mohamed and Sidie

Each afternoon almost every patient walks up 4 flights of stairs and sits outside on deck 7 for an hour or so. If they have an infection or foley, or k-wires, they are not allowed to but for the most part, this is the best part of the day for the patients. The kids get to play around and the adults are able to sit outside in the sun and talk on the phone or listen to music. For the patients who are here for months at a time it is very special. The hospital is on the third floor, with no windows. back in the states i always thought it was unfair to keep patients inside for months at a time. It seems like patients who are in the hospital for weeks go crazy for lack of sunlight. I believe this is important for their emotional and spiritual health. Yes there are bacteria and germs outside. but so what. theres bacteria in poop so theres really no getting away from it.

Sometimes deck 7 can be chaos, as shown here.